When I lived in what the Ugandan community calls (mizigo); there were about three couples with children. By all means, these children had to play together because of course they lived in the same fence.
However, there was this child who fought for everything – toys, sweets, anything! She fought for what was and wasn’t hers. I can say she was a bully or a bully in the making. Scratching, biting, beating up, spitting on and throwing stuff at her playmates. This kid was violent.
The parents of other children she played with, sometimes looked on as the toddlers fought. I think to avoid pointing it out to the girl’s parents that she was not a good child. Of course such utterances would turn into a wrangle between them (the parents). They instead kept their children away by calling them back home every time there was a fight of any kind. In such instances, I looked on and wondered how I would handle such a rivalry if I were one of those parents.
How do you raise a child and make sure they are not a cry baby or one that always fights with his/her playmates?
We parents have to be observant and closely watch how our children relate with others. Are they cooperative, do they share toys; do they grab or scratch others? When they offend or accidently harm their friends, do they apologise? If the above are not something to worry about according to you as a parent, then your child is the social type.
And if your child is the one that raises dust all the time, makes everyone cry, refuses to apologize or even never shares any of their stuff, you have a lot of training to do.
Parents with these cases have to devise means of training their children and shaping them into social people.
Talk to your child. Show them their faults and show them how to do things the right way. If your child doesn’t respond, give them simple punishments like leaving them home whenever everyone else is going to social functions, then explain to them why they have been left behind.
If they spoil their playmates toys, give away some of theirs to the child whose toy they spoilt earlier and explain why you did this.
In case all the above don’t help, I’m a strong believer in the saying that goes “spare the rod and spoil the child”. Give the child a few strokes. Make them repeat after you why you are punishing them and make them promise not to repeat that same mistake again. Bad habits turn into bad characters in the long run. Remember; a tree can only be bent when it’s young. Happy shaping parents…
